Sunday, February 28, 2010

Kick Her With Your Louboutins

People just love to kick someone when they are down and since it was announced a few days ago that Jennifer Lopez had "amicably" departed ways with Sony Records (DROPPED ON HER FAT PUERTO RICAN ASS is more like it) bloggers and entertainment columnists have wasted no time to bring out their claws and celebrate the fall of a struggling and aging diva. While I am not one to take pleasure in one's failures (unless it's someone I can't stand like Beyonce) I tend not to get happy over the flop and drop that happens to so many aging pop divas. However if the rumors are true then J-Lo is a nasty bitchy cunt who probably is getting what she deserves. BUT, I don't know the woman so I am going to stick to the facts here.

J-Lo's career is on life support because she let herself turn into shit. Plain and simple. She hasn't made a good album in years and there has only been a good single here and there since the early 00's. I remember when her debut album was released. She really was like this generations Paula Abdul. She couldn't sing to save her life but she had all the right material and dance moves to keep everyone entertained. Eleven years later "Waiting For Tonight" is still the freaking shit. But by 2003 J-Lo had left behind the fluffy and fun latin-tinged pop of her first album and now was "Jenny From The Block". Oh yes folks, the bitch was hardcore with all her guest rappers and bling. The tired rnb and faux hip-hop got old very quick and by 2005's Rebirth (or Afterbirth as I like to call it) no one care about her tired ass. Sure the Spanish album was slightly charming but considering her anorexic hubby's skeleton fingers were all over it from start to finish there wasn't much to like other than the lead single, "Que Hiciste". Jennifer's follow up tour was actually quite entertaining but her next album proved to be even more forgettable than Afterbirth. Now in the world of Gaga's, Beyonce's and Ke$ha's she tries to reinvent herself as some sort of pop supreme mistress with "Louboutins". It sounded like a horrible unsused Lady Gaga demo. Oh dear Jennifer. Please stop before you hurt yourself. oops too late, you already busted open your knee at the American Music Awards.

So I guess I couldn't stop myself from being a little catty too. It's not because I enjoy watching La Lopez flop but I get very frustrated when people ignore the signs that they need to change....or else! J-Lo chose to ignore her critics and still thinks this is 2002. Pobrecita.

Well, we will always have "Waiting For Tonight" the GLORIOUS Hex HEctor remix. That shit still sends tingles down my spine!

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